Are You a Taker of Faces?

Here we are many, many months later, during our summer travel voyage now; I’m finally getting the chance to share more about the little seaside huts in Bonaire that I mentioned wanting to share more about after our twenty-twenty-two end-of-the-year travel journey (which I’m sure no one remembers, except for me). Anyway, it’s one I want to share for several reasons. One, because it’s still stuck in my mind so vividly due to their story, one of which the tour guide couldn’t stop talking about the whole bus tour. And two, it brought on a necessary hot topic that is just as insidious as cancer in our world. Much of it can be remedied IF only a little more educative thought is applied. It would significantly improve the fiber of the world society that so many of us crave.

Furthermore, that tour guide lady’s fascination with what felt to be the only topic she could share that day on the bus tour, reminds me of something that I once read from Henry Thomas Buckle: “Even in an advanced stage of civilization, there is always a tendency to prefer those parts of literature which favor ancient prejudices, rather than those which oppose them; and in cases where this tendency is very strong, the only effect of great learning will be to supply the materials which may corroborate old errors and confirm old superstitions. In our time such instances are not uncommon; and we frequently meet with men whose erudition ministers to their ignorance, and who, the more they read the less they know.”

Such an insightful thought, isn’t it? Because when you think about it, the one who created the beautiful variety from animate to inanimate things that make life so much more enjoyable, corrected one of the ancient writers, Peter, through a divine vision in which he was reminded and inspired to pen,” God is not partial…,” (Acts 10:34) The Greek word for not partial means, not one who takes faces.

God doesn’t favor one face over another because of race, nationality, social standing, or any external factor. Granted, I acknowledge that it is a challenge to be impartial, largely because we are surrounded by prejudice in today’s world. And if we’re honest with ourselves, we have to admit that we all, deep down inside, harbor varying degrees of prejudice in one form or another. However, if this is a human tendency and we’re all plagued with it to some degree – then how do we overcome it? It might start with the word itself. The dictionary defines prejudice as a preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience. A preconceived opinion. That has to do with how we think and how we feel – thoughts that likely have been shaped by our personal experiences, upbringing, and environment.

Now, maybe when we think of prejudice, perhaps our minds go to or focus on racial prejudice, hatred, or animosity toward someone, but prejudices can also be formed against another person because of their weight, language, gender, social status, religion, or virtually any perceived difference. And in today’s renovation generation, even one’s “decor style taste” could get you shunned on social media. So if prejudice starts with our personality, our personal preconceived opinions, then the way to overcome it has to start by elevating our minds by not making surface judgments but paying attention to the character and qualities of others. 

Think of a geode: on the outside surface, a geode looks ordinary and nondescript, no different than any big rock or stone you’d find on the ground. But if you break it open…ahh, quite a different story. When you look inside, you see these beautiful sparkling crystals of varying colors that are quite beautiful and radiant to the eye.

What’s the point? When we make surface judgments or preconceived opinions about others, often, aren’t we looking at others like the outside of that geode? All we see is just the external surface. And isn’t it so true if someone is a certain skin color, has an accent, is shy, quiet, or reserved, it’s so easy to label them, isn’t it? We size them up and quickly come to the conclusion, “Ah, you know what? There’s not much there, and we instantly can feel the ‘they’re less than me’ mentality. They really don’t have much to offer, or they can’t, shouldn’t possess, or can’t afford the same things as us.” Could it be in those particular instances that we have become a taker of faces? We’ve made a judgment purely based on personal opinion or what we feel is acceptable. Again, the word “prejudice” can literally be broken down into “pre-” and “judgment.” Aptly, much of prejudice stems from our pre-judging other people’s habits, customs, clothes, way of speaking, and values. We often do this with no basis for the judgment other than the fact that they (the customs, values, food, etc) are different from our own. The phenomenal thing is our biases are malleable. Learning about them can give us the self-insight and motivation we need to undertake the journey of change.

So then, what can we do to overcome this disease, so to speak, due to processes that happen outside of our awareness? To overcome prejudiced impulses, we have to focus on the character and the qualities of a person. With some people, that may take time. One expert stated: “There are many different ways to open a geode. But no matter how you do it, the key is patience, patience, patience.” And isn’t it true that looking at someone beyond just the surface takes time and patience? It takes time to get to know others, time and patience to understand someone else’s background, and the way they think, what they do. Instead of forming biased opinions without any facts, show personal interest by asking questions because when we do, we’re rewarded. We begin to see the crystals; we begin to see their inner beauty inside; we discover true depth in each other. Doing so takes the love and kindness that we talk about so much. Opening our hearts, widening out, genuinely getting along with one another – not allowing ingrained hatred from our upbringing or environment to control us.

The bottom line is that overcoming the entrenched negative trait of prejudice is possible. But it all starts with an honest self-examination: ‘Can I identify any traces of prejudice within me? ‘ It all starts with elevating our way of thinking. Let’s avoid surface judgments, being “a taker of faces.” Let’s take the time to get to know other fellow humans and appreciate their character and qualities – their inner beauty. After all, we all came from the same forefather; therefore, we all are brothers and sisters. Seeing each other that way will help us remain humble, which is a quality of strength rather than weakness. Whether we want to accept that or not, doesn’t make it less true. It would be equivalent to the faulty thinking that what ‘I do or how I treat the planet doesn’t matter.’ But look at how that’s affected our ecosystem with the rapid effect of global warming that we’re currently facing.

I often think of times like 9/11 and the Covid19 pandemic, where everyone was reduced to the same level in a very unpredictable short time regardless of their financial status, ethnicity, or class. This life reality helps us recognize that we have no reason to elevate ourselves above others just because of status and financial means. I do understand it’s not like you ever fully eliminate bias, but I know we all can grow and improve the impact we make in our interdependent world to live a much healthier lifestyle mentally. In addition to how much more filled with joy and satisfaction, we would experience by viewing and treating others how we’d like to be treated. 

In the end, ignorance is the source of biases. If we cure that, there’s nothing to fear and hate.

If you’ve gotten this far, thank you for reading. I’d appreciate it even more if you would share this post with others.